May 15th, 2004

i'm ready for my close up mr demille

Freschetta Pizza

I saw an unintentionally funny television commercial that had me in stitches.

The Freschetta Pizza company specializes in gourmet-style frozen pizzas. They have just introduced a new line in their stable of pizzas, the new "Brick Oven" style. The television commercial makes ample audio reference to this through-out the commercial, without the slightest hint of sarcasm.

Freschetta Brick Oven Pizza

I can't believe the audible and obvious trick it plays on the human ear was never considered by its advertisers in its conception, pitch, and production. It's kinda like that boy-band punk song where he says "I'm addic... I'm addicted to you", just without the hint that they know exactly what they're doing or that it's intentional... the fact that they seem to be obvlivious to what it sounds like is what makes it so funny. I can't believe not one person in the process said, "Do you realize that it sounds like....?"

Of course, this would mean that the exact opposite would have to be true. They knew exactly what they were doing, and the complete lack of sarcasm/self-conciosuness in the commercial is sheer brilliance.

So I don't know what to think. Either the people at Freschetta had something completely fly over their head or it is a shrewd and calculated play on words. Either way, it makes me laugh.

Spiderbait is an insanely unappreciated/underrated band.
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i'm ready for my close up mr demille

lookin' like famous people

Ok, so I got this interesting link from hazlewood, where you submit a picture of yourself and it compares you to the faces of famous people. But I wasn't content to just put in a picture and gawk at the famous people to whom I bear a passing resemblance, I wanted to play with different pictures of myself with various lighting and hairstyles and see how different the results would end up. The following links are supposed to be good for at least 48 hours, so hopefully they'll be good through Monday afternoon, the day when most of you will read this. :)

The first picture I submitted was probably the most representative of me, albeit one where I still have considerably more hair line than I currently do. I must say I never thought I bore any resemblance to Liam Neeson but in those two pictures, I can see it, although, he's got way more chin than I do. But I noticed how much the hair played in match-up, as you can tell, all three pictures which came up as matches to me have similar hair length and shapes.

So I thought it'd be fun to go with a fun hair picture. The second picture I used came from one evening just before taking a shower. My hair had been kept underneath a ski cap all day and it's quite long. I was having fun making faces in the mirror and playing with my hair, so, naturally, I thought this would be a fun picture to mess with next.

Enrique Iglesias?!?! C'mon. I can see Clint with the furrowed brow making for wrinkles and I can even see Tim Robbins, but Enrique Iglesias? Blah. But again, the way the hair frames the face is obviously one of the keys to this, plus the whole width between the eys thing, Clint's head in his picture is tilted very slightly like mine is in my picture.

While playing with the camera that day I did one with the ski cap on so, naturally, with how the hair frames the face being so importnat, I thought I'd submit this one as my third picture. Plus my eyes are doing this pyscho thing. I can understand George Clooney 'cos of the way our mouths are in those pictures, and Al Pacino just 'cos of the whole psycho thing, but Antonio Banderas I don't get at all.

It was about this time that I got the idea to reverse the gender. Submitted for your dismay, the female people I resemble for pictures one, two, and three. I might add, the search process for female recognition takes a lot longer. Also, for the record, I can actually see the Oprah Winfrey resemblance.

So then I got silly. I got to thinking of that Axl Rose picture I acquired for my icon, so I thought that, if Axl Rose wasn't already famous, he might wonder who he looked like that was famous. Aside from the somewhat disturbing trend of all three people being of completely different ethnicity than Axl, there's also the whole issue that he also looks like Antonio Banderas. So why did I not look like Michael Jordan or Eddie Murphy?

Made curious by this coincidence, I thought what would happen if I submitted a picture that was identical to a picture in their database. So I took the Antonio Banderas picture and saved it my hard drive then re-submitted it for comparison. Would he look like Antonio Banderas?

Of course he does. Don't be silly, but he also looks like Denzel Washington and... Kyle MacLachlan?!?!?! Wtf?

When you're submitting the picture, you have to click on the left eye and right eye so the search engine can measure the distance between the eyes for comparison. I wondered what would happen if two people were in the picture? I have this photo of me and my pal mybluenotepad that janietrain took of us in Little Italy a couple of months ago. I submitted it with my right eye clicked and mybluenotepad's left eye selected. Apparently, if mybluenotepad and I were capable of producing spawn together it would have a good chance of looking like Val Kilmer, Jackie Chan, or Charles Bronson if it were a boy and Princess Diana, Cher, and whoever the hell Isabelle Adjani is if it were a girl.

Then in a fit of brilliance that Salvador Dali would be proud of, I re-sbumitted picture one and, for the eye clicks, I clicked the left on the left side of my forehead and the right eye on my right cheek. It only proves that Jackie Chan is the product of some unnatural union. Any doubts that Scott Baio isn't evil incarnate should now be laid to rest.

Finally, since she was being so sweet sleeping between my legs while I was submitting pictures and composing this entry, I thought it only fitting to see who Fubu looks like.