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i can't drive... FIFTY FIVE!!!!!

n a poll by ruxxell this morning asking various questions about driving cars, a question about the number of speeding tickets one has had was in it, with a list of choices ranging from 0 to 12. Unfortunately, my answer doesn't fit into that range. See, I've had lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of speeding tickets. I would guess somewhere in the low twenties. The problem is, I've lost count!

And yet I've never lost my license. Kentucky has a State-sponsored traffic school, which I have attended 7 or 8 times. In fact, I just attended taffic school in the past year for the speeding ticket I got in eastern Kentucky. I'm sure someday I'll be there again. In the old days, you could attend the traffic school after getting a speeding ticket if you hadn't been in the last 24 months. They've gotten even more liberal with it in the past few years, allowing you to go every 12 months. How does driving school work? It's a 4 hours class that essentially expunges the speeding violation from your record, including the points. In the past 15 years that I've been going to traffic school not much has changed in the curriculum. You watch movies about DUI and safety belts and things like that. It's boring and wastes half of a Saturday but it beats increases in your insurance rates. It's safe to say I have a bit of a lead foot. I like to drive fast. I don't think I'm a reckless or an unsafe driver, I just like to drive faster than the posted limits allow.

Anyway, I thought that, like other lists I've begun in LiveJournal for my own amusement to keep track of things, this would be a fun one to start. Now comes the task of remembering them all. There's no way I'll be able to remember the exact chronology/year (although I certainly remember the first I ever got) nor am I likely to remember the actual violation, but I do remember where I got them and in most cases, what I was driving. So here's the list, to the best of my recollection, which will be ongoing as new ones are acquired. Unless otherwise noted, the tickets were issued in the Lexington metro area.

1. The First: I-64, southern Indiana, 75mph in a 55mph zone - I got my first speeding ticket when I was 16 (so this would've been 1986) and I was in southern Indiana. My younger brother and I had gone to Evansville with my dad where he had some work to do in his duties as a traveling sales representative. My dad had decided to enlist us in the work to make things go faster and pay us a little something for the effort. To make things go faster, we took two cars so that we could go to multiple sites and get the work done faster. At the end of the day, my brother and I were left to our own devices to drive home while my dad finished some work. I was driving a 1978 Ford Town & Country station wagon, white with brown side panels. It was nicknamed "The Tank". On I-64 through southern Indiana, I was opening her up a little to see what she'd do. At some point, we passed the little Escort with a family of three inside, the third being a cute teenage girl. For some reason, I (along with unspoken encouragement from my brother int he form of laughing, etc) decided it would be fun to slow down, causing the Escort to pass me, then speed-up again, continually passing the car with the cute girl. After several times of this, it grew old and I let the Escort go on. I few minutes later, I came around a curve in the highway and I saw the Escort on the side of the road, just behind a state trooper, its driver standing beside the cruiser talking to the police office and pointing at me as I came around the curve. To make a long story short, the father of the family was a Kentucky state trooper on vacation with his family and my shenanigans had freaked him out so he had radioed for assistance. Once pulled over by the Indiana trooper, I naively admitted to speeding with a guess of 75mph (in a 55mph zone) which is what my citation was issued for.

2. Bluegrass Parkway (Anderson Co.), 65mph in a 55mph zone.

3. Bluegrass Parkway (Woodford Co.), 95mph in a 55mph zone. By far, the worst violation I ever had. I was driving this POS Buick compact car that was probably only registered to 85mph, but I was coming down the hill at the Kentucky River at about 2am giving it everything she had. Heh.

4. Versailles Road, 70mph in a 55mph zone.

5. Parkers-Mill Road, 45mph in a 35mph zone.

6. Tates Creek Road, 55mph in a 35mph zone.

7. Southview Dr, 45mph in a 35mph zone. I got this, and the following ticket in a two week span in a speed trap setup there.

8. Southview Dr, 45mph in a 35mph zone.

9. Prince Albert Way, 45mph in a 35mph zone. I got this and the following ticket in a two week span as well, both while delivering pizzas.

10. Malibu Drive, 45mph in a 35mph zone.

11. Woodland Ave, 50mph in a 35mph zone.

12. Man O' War Blvd, 55mph in a 45mph zone.

13. Fontaine Rd, 50mph in a 35mph zone.

14. I-75 north (Georgetown), 75mph in a 65mph zone.

15. Ohio Hwy 12 (Bettsville, OH), 55mph in a 35mph zone.

16. U.S. 23 (Paintsville, KY), 70mph in a 55mph zone.

17. Ohio Turnpike, 72 in a 65mph zone.

I'm forgetting some along the way. I know that one time I had performed this exercise in my head and had it up to 17-18 tickets, and that was before the last two on this list. This'll have to do for now. Hopefully I'll remember the others at a later date.


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Hopefully none of these violations will ever involve the Welfmobile.

No speeding in the Welfmobile?

I think I've had about ten. I have a list somewhere.

Have you had any tickets while driving truck?

The last two on the list were both in the truck. Neither appeared on my driving record though. I was able to take care of the Kentucky one with traffic school. As for the Ohio ticket, they have a lovely system by which is you pay your fine within ten days, and you haven't had a speeding ticket in the past twelve months, it won't show on your record.


In CA, we can take traffic school once every 12months. However, it's 8 hours on a Saturday and it blows. Last time I went, I got sexually harrassed by the teacher (as did others) and all we did was talk about how we got our tickets. It was such a waste of time. he let us go early, but still. Now you can do your traffic school on line, and it's more expensive, but you can do it in like 15 minutes flat.

Yikes, 8 hours?!?!? I think that would be bordering cruel and unusual punishment. The online option sounds pretty nifty though, unless it's just outrageously more expensive. I'm sure that, as a truck driver, my first ticket in California is still to come, as you live in one of the dumb states with split speed limit for trucks and four wheelers. Dumb dumb dumb.

On a side note, I didn't leave a comment, but I got a kick out of the furry journal you post a link to the other day. I showed it to Welf and then we had fun looking through the bio and pictures last night. Furries are creepy folk.

The only time I've ever been pulled over (knock on wood) was for doing 63 in a 55 on US 127 somewhere south (I think) of Danville, KY. Luckily, I just got cautioned to slow down.

Seriously, 63 in a 55? Do Kentucky troopers have nothing better to do than pull people over?

Actually, I'm surprised you got pulled over for that. The rule of thumb for most KY troopers seems to be "nine your fine, ten your mine" with concern to speeding. A quick look through my list pretty much tells that story. I've never been pulled-over for anything less than ten miles over.

I was 5 when you started driving.


I lost my virginity when you were six.

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Indiana is nice to truck drivers I've discovered. I don't know if that translates to all motorists or not. I've been pulled-over three times in Indiana for doing 65 in a 55 zone and merely given a warning and a hasty roadside inspection then sent on my merry way.

50 on Woodland Ave. takes talent.

Get this. I was in a 1983 Ford Escort with a manual transmission and it was raining. According to the police officer, I left the stop light at Euclid and accelerated UP the hill and hit 50mph before I got to Maxwell Street.

I went to court to fight it on principle just because I didn't think it was possible. I have no idea how fast I was going, I never payed attention.

i... am moving to kentucky.

I don't use my smoking icon nearly enough.

Bonus points for obtaining two tickets at the same speed trap in less than a month.

I felt really special after that one.

I think I saw a truck from your company today- you wernt by any chance on RT220 S in PA today around 18:00 were you?

I'm in PA, but I haven't moved the truck since Wednesday. I've been taking some time off over here in New Castle.

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