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doo dee doo
i'm ready for my close up mr demille
soopageek
well... nothing of any real interest happened... we ate some chicken, hung out at the park.... started to watch a movie over at her apartment later that evening but she was kind of in the midle of putting the stops on the guy she's been seeing for the past few weeks and, during a phone conversations while we were there in which she ended their dating relationship, he was now coming over to get some of hist stuff that was around the aparment... so my roomate and myself excused ourselves... i offered to take her son with us to our house for a while in case things got heated.... which i guess she thought might be a good idea so we did... then she came over later afterwards and spent the night.... nothing of a physical nature happened... unless getting to have someone beside me in the bed again counts... which was nice....

actually, after taking her son to school this moring she's come back here and crashed some more.... i don't think she's been getting much sleep lately.... i worry about her.... but she's got her own life to make choices for.... all i hope to do is encourage her to do whatever it is it takes to make her happy.... she still has so much to look forward too (in case i've never mentioned, she's considerably my junior... she'll be 21 in june).... this is when people should be out dating, meeting lots of people... and it's so easy to do that at that age, because a lot of your life is of that design... especially college, which she's starting in the fall.... when you get older, those fantastic opportunities like college are no longer around... you're pretty much relegated to the workplace and friendship networks... and when yer an introvert... well, we've already been there....

so i guess when i consider all of this... this is why it really doesn't bother me that she's out seeing other people... she should be...

in other news.... i think there's this girl that's kinda/sorta hitting on me.... there've been three vague instances that seemed like moments... maybe sometime when i have more energy i'll elaborate on them.... of course, this is probably all in my mind... the portion of my psyche with the low-self esteem that i keep tied down most of the time can't help but rear it's head from the cold slab and yell at me about how she's so much out of my league and what's going on is imagined and not real because yer a little on the lonely side.....

and it doesn't help that she's another young'un... she cant be more than 19-20.... you'd think i'd learn ;-)

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