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location: cincinnati
i'm ready for my close up mr demille
soopageek
welp, i decided to post what few entries i had made in my offline journal here at livejournal and intened to just start keeping everything here.... i got onf of the clients floating around here and figured out how to save them to files, then whenever i have the opportunity to get online, i can jjust post/back date them all.... the more "personal" things i can make private, or just friends, or just "certain" friends (not that i have many who read thi anyway)... and i'm good to go.... although i'd be lying if i said i didn't feel a little bit paranoid that soem of more intimate thoughts are "online" even if they are only -supposed- to be able to be read by myself....

six flags was a lot of fun... chelsea couldn't go because she had a little league game that evening, so it was just me, daniel and joey.... we finally talked joey onto one of the coasters... the T2... which ranks as one of my all time favorite coasters.... anyway, he was so nervous and scared... he'd never ridden a coaster and was scared of them.... he had his eyes closed most of the ride, but you could hear him yell out "oh yeah!" in glee when it went through the triple corkscrew... he loved it... he hasn't totally conquered his fear of coasters, but it's a start....

i thought i had a bad week last week with all of the back trouble, my friend robin had two uncles commit suicide within a week of each other, one with a gun, theo ther with a knife... when i home last weekend she had just gotten back from Wolfe County where her family is from... they had buried her uncle on friday... this friday, when i get into town, my brother tells me he had tried calling robin but her boyfriend nate told him she had gone back to wolfe county to deal with a death in the family... i just assumed it was still related to the death i knew about.... today when i stopped by her work to say hi, she informed me that another uncle, the first one's brother... also committed suciide this past week.... both of these are her mother's brothers... her mother is one of 10 children, and now she has lost two brothers to suicide, two sisters to fire related deaths (when one was 4 and the other was 10).... oh, and her father was murdered (robin's grandfather)... the doctors have robin on antidepressants to help her through.... i love her so much... i have no desire to try to renew anything with her, we've both played that out and are content with simply being friends (well, so long as one of us continues to be so stubborn about being monogamous and the other polyamorous ;-), but i still love her so much, when she hurts, i hurt....

i just lit a cigarette and already had one burning in the ashtray, i hate it when i do that....

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